As the weeks draw near to another visit to Australia by my mother and (not quite) little buddy I am reminded to the last time they were here, with my father, in early 2012. Almost 4 years ago now.
My father returns with them this time in a new form, a small box containing the remains of his physical body to be present at my wedding and to find his eternal resting point in the warmth of the Indian Ocean (on another day in the future).
But this is not about what's missing or perhaps it is but in a different form of what we often think.
I can recall independent events from their last trip, standing on the shores of the Southern ocean, playing for hours with the Kangaroos, surviving the 40 degree heat sitting in stillness on the front porch, random trips to the ocean. But when I think of it as a whole it turns into a blur, seemingly something that went by all too quickly, something I just took for granted in the moment- looking always to the future rather than being present in the moment.
This time I vow to be more present. To enjoy each moment as it comes, being more than doing and finding gratitude in all the craziness that comes with a houseful of guests, of extended family through the holiday, of the insanity leading into the week of our wedding.
Through the chaos I will slow down and savor the love around me, I will cherish the new memories we are making and I will enjoy each moment as it comes and then goes. I will not worry for the future or cling to plans made, I will flow through the days with love and joy, basking in the purity of living. Being grateful for everyone here with me now.